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What every girlfriend really needs from her boyfriend?

A dozen roses, romantic dinners, love notes? We girls love all of these things but these are really not the things we need the most from you. Girls are more driven by non-tangible things – they want to know how you feel, they want to connect with your heart, they desire security and trust. What they really need is a simple (1)“Good morning” text from you – a simple reminder that you remember her every time you wake up. (2)Your replies, no matter how busy you are, this act shows how important she is to you – it doesn’t matter how fast or slow, as long as you respond to her messages.(3) Your compliments, because she needs to know you think she is beautiful. Deep at the core of every girl is the desire to know that she is beautiful, valuable and worthy to be pursued. (4)Your honesty, be a man of your words.  When you take the lead in an honest communication with your girlfriend, you help her guard her heart. (5)Your trust, never doubt her feelings towards you because she loves you more than your flaws. (Sabi pa nga: “Kung nahihirapan ka na pagkatiwalaan sya, pagkatiwalaan mo muna yung pagmamahal mo sa kanya.”) (6)Your presence, they don’t need expensive gifts because your presence is more than enough to fill the joy in her heart. (7) Your time, your hectic schedule is not a valid reason for you not to make time for her. Time is the most valuable asset you can give to someone because you can’t get it back after you spend it. So, use it wisely in your relationship. (8)Your comfort when she’s dealing with life challenges, more than her family and friends, she needs you to encourage her in times she’s in trouble. (9)Your  “I love you” this may be simple but that’s the easiest way to put a smile on her face. (10)Your support, her passion and goals in life shouldn’t be taken for granted. Encourage and motivate her to achieve it. If she needs improvement, tell her, but never belittle her desires. (11)Your understanding, more than your ire, she needs a guy who’ll look at every situation with understanding. Who won’t let the demons of “what ifs” confused him, who won’t be deceived by all the negative things he has in mind, and who won’t get carried away by overthinking because it can kill the relationship. (12)Your acceptance, she’s not perfect, she has a lot of flaws, she makes mistakes but despite of all these things your acceptance is all what matters most. Let her be comfortable with you despite of all the weird things she does. (13)Your proud presence, she wants you to let the whole world know she is your girl and how much you love her. Taking her for granted in front of your friends crushed her feelings. (14)Your patience, be willing to wait for her even if she takes an hour dressing up, shopping, or taking the shower because true love is patient.

What a girl really needs from you is to feel loved, safe, seen, appreciated, and to feel like she can always count on you. So as much as possible, don’t ever make her feel unwanted. If you think you’re the only one who’s overthinking, Girls overthink the most. Learn to value her feelings too, not just your deep emotional thoughts.

What I’ve mentioned above are only some of the things you need to know, the rest is for you to find out as go through your relationship.  Visit and follow my blog site @ marydelmitchcom.wordpress.com

 

 

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People with depression aren’t weak, they are strong

Depression isn’t something to take lightly; it is something that should be taken seriously. Well, if you’re someone who’s going through depression, or you know someone who’s suffering from it, this is for you.

It’s hard to know where to start when it comes to mental health issues. Everyone tells you to “speak up” and “voice out how you feel” but they not often understand how hard it can be. I know how it feels, because I’ve been in that situation and I have to admit it was really tough. I was tired, really tired. I was edgy and emotional and anxious. I began noticing that I felt exactly like it looked outside – gray and miserable. I felt helpless, unwanted, useless, and terribly down. I was afraid and ashamed to tell them how I feel, because I know people can belittle my thoughts and emotions. They might as well say I’m exaggerating when I tell them I’m suffering from depression.

Now, for those who are suffering from it, I want to say I am proud of you for clicking into this message. It takes a lot of courage to admit that you’re feeling depressed, even if you’re only admitting it to yourself for now. You are strong, because you continue working and getting through it.  Sometimes, it’s circumstantial, but often you’re left scratching your head asking, “Where did all the joy go?” I know there are no magic words that will make you feel better and it can be tough to know what to say to someone that is suffering from it. But avoiding the subject is the worst tactic, it breeds guilt and will only make you feel like an outsider. Don’t be embarrassed about talking to someone. Sometimes, counselling is one of the way out of the hole you’re in right now. All you need is someone that will help you and take that enormous weight off your shoulders. But you also need to know that despite of the people around you; God is there with you in the depression you’re going through. He’s not waiting for you to come out of it before walking with you, but he’s willing to walk with you in the midst of it. I want you to know that God is not silent when you suffer. Probably you’re asking questions like “Why are you doing this to me?”  “God, are you even there?” Doubt, confusion, and distress are there.  God hasn’t promised to explain everything about what he does and what he allows. But he encourages us to be strong. Depression says, you are alone and you should act that way. But that is not true, because God is with you and he calls you to reach out to someone who will listen, care, and pray for you. If you know anything about God, you know that he comes close to those who suffer, so keep your eyes open for him.

Meanwhile, for those people who don’t take depression seriously, I want you to understand what people with depression want you to know. First, people with depression can’t just snap out of it – no matter how hard they try to fight back it overpowers them and there’s nothing they can do about it.  Second, people with depression don’t always have a reason as to why they’re feeling depressed. Third, they don’t choose to be depressed – it is out of their control and they can’t do anything to stop it from happening. Fourth, the achievements that you see as small are already big to them – sometimes just getting out of bed or talking to someone about how they’re feeling is an achievement. Fifth, they appreciate your kind words and how you’re trying to help them. And lastly, they’re trying their best to get through it.

It might take weeks, months, or even years to get over it but eventually I know you’ll feel better again. You’ll start seeing all the possibilities that life has to offer you, instead of focucing on the negative things. You’ll start to feel like you again. And you’ll remember what it’s like to be genuinely happy. Whatever you’re going through right now, always know that the pain won’t last forever. So, KEEP GOING!

Why my happiness is killing other people?

The closer I get to success in life, the more friends I lose. I’d love to be happy but I also hate to kill people just because of the joy I’m experiencing right now. Should I get jailed for it? Am I tagged as a murderer now? Well, I hope happiness is not a crime.

I honestly want to share that bunch of joy to people close to my heart. Unfortunately, they’re covered with the darkness of that green-eyed monster that’s why they hate and already forget what we used to have. Why? Can’t I be happy? Do I not deserve it?

Why not just be happy for someone else’s happiness, instead of blaming other people for your miserable life? You will never truly find your own happiness if you keep on comparing yourself to others.

Now let me dig up to you the reasons why they hate my happiness. My smile intimidates those who wish to destroy me. My glowing face is a reflection of what they wish to be. My laugh is a sign that they caved to fear, uncertainty, pressure, and they gave up. My success reminds them that living the average life isn’t always fulfilling and that they still have a dream but they aren’t hustling to make it happen.

The next time you are flying high and you feel the hate rays shining on you, better hide now, because I might kill you with my own happiness. Seeing myself basking in the light of happiness and joy while others are dying from it, is a crime I wouldn’t regret.

I can’t change negative people. I can’t force them to see things the way I did. But I can always be grateful for the attention and time they took for my life. I’m too busy working on my own grass to notice if yours is greener. So, I won’t let your bitterness kill my spirit, but I will let my happiness kill you.

 

 

To the people who always put others before themselves

She has two names- brawny and puny; she has two sides- strong and weak.

She is strong and fierce on the outside, yet dying inside. She’s not the type of person who would tell you everything, because she doesn’t want everyone to feel pity for her. You might see her in silence but she’s shouting in pain inside. Her smiles hide the most painful curves, her cheerful eyes put off every weep she feel inside, and her laugh conceal every sob she doesn’t want everyone to hear.

She is a giver, a provider of the people she treasures the most. She always thinks of others before herself. And that’s the problem of putting others first, because you’ve taught them that you come second.

She is a special type of person. She’s able to put her needs and wants behind; for the sake of the people she loves. However, even though there are times when she feels like all her hard works, sacrifices, and selflessness go unrecognized, she doesn’t mind. Because all she ever wants is to see the people in her life happy, but her happiness is important too.

The starting point for all happiness is shifting the focus away from herself to other people. She is willing to sacrifice her own happiness just to help her love ones, because love is putting someone else’s needs before her.

She stays in silence instead of ranting how tired she is, because she doesn’t want everyone to see her in pain. She is good at hiding her emotions. And when she feels like she can no longer handle it, she’s quietly bursting the entire ache alone.

She is a strong woman who is able to smile in the morning like she wasn’t crying last night. She is fierce, strong, and full of fire. That she could not even hold herself back because her passion burned brighter than her fears. She can’t leave them behind and so she keeps on holding on.

You might see her easy going, but you don’t know she’s walking on a rough road with barefoot. She may look fierce but actually she’s a cry baby. You only know her as brawny but you don’t her as puny. You might see her strong on the outside but you don’t know her struggles inside.

Yet she remain unspoken because she knows she can, and she won’t ask for anything to other people as long she can still handle everything in her hands. Isn’t she tough?

Well she may be tired, but she’s not giving up. She doesn’t need anyone’s sympathy, because she thinks she’s brave enough to face everything with his (God) guidance.

How does it feel to be in love?

I was lying on the roof while watching those countless stars as I try to extend my hand, reaching them from afar. Suddenly I saw stars forming a vision of myself, trying to walk on the ocean with barefoot while enjoying the waves. Then there’s a gradual change of that unusual dream, I even dare to jump off the cliff without any hesitations while feelin’ the air as I fly high.

Now someone ask me…

How does it feel to be in love?

Imagine doing things impossible.

That was the moment I feel like I’m in the Milky Way, seeing those beautiful shiny stars above. I feel like I can walk on the water and face the waves without being afraid of. And even if I jump off the cliff, I don’t care if I fall because I can fly high just like those birds flocking their wings.

 

Love is a pretty powerful drug.

You get high and everything’s in slow motion. It suspends time, making the whole world stops for a moment; it feeds you more than any nourishment- you feel full in the presence of love. It’s an endless tunnel that sweeps you up in the whirlwind and it’s quite tough to free yourself from it.

How does it feel to be in love?

It feels like being home.

It makes me feel like I can accomplish things that scare me. It goes beyond the initial passion. You go through life’s ups and downs as partners.

Being in love, never feels restrictive. You could be anywhere else yet you choose to be in that partnership over and over.

Staying in love is a choice. Its way too easy to fall in love but it’s more challenging to nurture a long-term love.

When you’re in love, you feel that glowing sensation from within. Every decision you make has a new significance because it impacts someone very dear to you.

Life becomes more interesting in new ways.

How does it feel to be in love?

Well…words are not enough to explain it.

Love is an endless feeling; you can’t undo what you feel.

There is something about finding that one person to love which gives life a special feeling. The idea of romantic love is usually intertwined with the belief that we have a single soul mate out there who can feel the hole we know we have.

The more love we feel, the greater our power to create a magnificent life. However, love is a blood-curdling road to venture down. It is not just all about happiness, but you have to deal with bitterness and heartaches as well.

I was once afraid to take one step on a boundary I created between love and fear, but then I realized there is nothing to be afraid of. Why? Because Love is all about taking risks. You wouldn’t know how it feels until you break all of those fences you created. Remember how God sacrificed his life for the people he loves without any hesitations? That is the perfect image of Love in which we should all look up to.

I found myself now going through a process of pealing back the layers of emotional growth. There may be a lot of ways to love but some of them mean different things in different circumstances. The law of attraction has been called the law of love, because the law itself is a gift of love to humanity. It might be a bit risky but I tell you, love is a beautiful feeling in which everyone should take a risk.

 

 

 

To the man who lost me FOREVER

 

“Hi. How are you? How’s life? How’s your career? Are you doing good reviewing? Is it road to CPA now?”

Well, I used to care so much. I tried my best to hold on and keep you, but you didn’t want this as much as I did. I never wanted to pleased anyone, yet I was still there hoping and praying that you would see my worth.

For how long was it again I was waiting for you?

Imagine all those guys I rejected just because of you. Imagine my feelings cut with a blunted knife. Imagine those moments with you that made me feel happy but the majority of the time you shut me out. I hope you also regret about losing me, like how you dropped a diamond while picking up pennies.  I cared for you even if “there was never an us”. I cared for you even if “we’re near yet so far”. I cared for you even if you didn’t care for me.

However…

I know I also caused you heartache at the time of me walking away. You should have been careful of how far you push me away because I ended up liking it there.

It’s like…

I waited.

Got tired.

Lost hope.

And let go.

You had me with your words but lost me with your actions. I was the one who loved you even though you gave me thousands of reasons not to. Congratulations you lost me! 🙂 And thank you for losing me because it leads me to the right one. You showed me my worth and teach me to let go of people I don’t deserve.

Do not feel sorry for me because I only lost you: someone who does not deserve the love I showed, someone who’s not worth fighting for, and someone who took me for granted. But you lost me, you wasted the love someone showed you, you gave up someone who’s worth fighting for, and you throw away a precious gold.

Hence, despite of all those throbbing past I am still grateful that I experienced it, because I ended up with someone who’s afraid of losing me.

And I am happy to finally found someone…

I deserve to wake up in bed next to a man that is happy to see me beside him.

Someone that kisses me in spite of morning breathe and can’t get out of bed before making love to me again.

Someone who won’t stay mad at me, who can’t stand not talking to me, and who’s afraid of losing me.

No more heartaches because I didn’t lose you. You lost me and I thank you for that. 🙂

Why my BASHERS are my biggest FAN

I know that my life is more interesting than you. (No doubt) Probably my name is starting to get out there that’s why I have you (bashers) but no worries because I accept all of you wholeheartedly and I thank you all for coming without knocking on my door.

Haters are my favorite; I am now currently building an empire with the bricks you’ve thrown at me. Don’t you know that “Hating” is the sincerest form of flattery? Well, thanks for wasting your time on me-I appreciate it. Being judged by you shows how important I am- that you exert so much effort and time thinking and talking about me.

Reading all your negative comments and messages won’t bring me down because I am too far above the ground to step unto to your levels. All those nasty things you’ve said, definitely reflects on you. So why would I be affected? You don’t even know me and you don’t have the right to judge me just because of what you see or hear from other people. Who do you think are you to judge the life I live? I may not be perfect but before you start pointing fingers on me, make sure your hands are clean.

I am indeed grateful that I am always a trending topic in your life. There is no doubt that you are all my number 1 fans. “Love me or hate me, either way I’m on your mind.” Don’t worry; I won’t degrade myself by making me hate you because my time is too precious to waste just by worthless people. Remember… You don’t hurt me but rather, you hate yourselves more than I do and I feel pity to all of you.

However, once again I would like to say thank you for making me feel famous. (Flips my hair)

Against all odds

At some point, when two people enter into a relationship they will always find folks opposed to it. I’m talking about friends, family or anyone around you just disliking your partner over something trivial. Now ask me, how does it feel when you’re dating someone whom all the people on earth despise and think he is toxic? Well, I honestly feel like I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place. Just think of it, after a long and difficult period of finding “the one” who would though that I’ll fall for someone I didn’t expect to. And it’s kind’a funny how my first is against all odds.

Love is a beautiful feeling in which no one should oppose. I should be happy but how can I be happy if there’s a sad part of me, thinking about those people I treasure the most yet against our relationship? Tell me how can I be happy if they are not happy for me?

I didn’t choose whom to fall in love with, my heart does. Now tell me, was it wrong to feel that way? When did love become so wrong?  Was it falling for someone who had a terrible past with someone else? If “you” or should I say “they” never have luck in love, one must accept it but does not mean everyone will go wrong. I will not say, you have to understand me because I have nothing to explain to all of you.

I didn’t choose “Love over friendship” or “Love over family”, because I believe there are no choices between them. However, I chose to love myself and free myself from that caged where the opinion of other people always matter.  I don’t want to be locked in that cage again.

It makes no sense trying to separate those who truly love each other; it’s just a waste of time as they continue to love. Many might say “there is no forever”, I’d like to reply you with a brighter smile on my face and say “Yes I know. You no longer have to remind me.”

I know that “goodbyes” really do exist, but every ending has a new beginning and only acceptance is the key to move on.  (And I am surely prepared for that :P)

Thus, if the two are eager to be happy without listening to the people who want to separate them, well, it’s their decision and no one has to say the contrary. Why not just be happy and find your own happiness.

 

UNEXPECTED LOVE

Somewhere between all the laughs, silly jokes, long talks, stupid fights and all those crazy things we do together…  I suddenly fell in love with the most unexpected person at the most unexpected time. You’ll really find the beauty of love once you did not expect it to happen. I was not the type of person who would dare to take a risk in love. I was cynical and falling in love was not my thing. For me, Love was like a blind whore with mental disease and no sense of humor at all.

LOVE?

Love was like a gravity, which causes things to drop erratically. The more you toss it away, the more it falls. Despite of the pleasure it gives, it was a canister filled of blissful and excruciating memories. Stuck in a place where nobody wants to dredge up those throbbing past.

Love was playful. It was a game of rash and wise folks. Foolish hearts are those who waste their time and effort innocently trusting trashy people. Who let their own minds and hearts be dupe by those sweet-smelling words they hear.

That was how I perceived love before. That was how I imagined it. That was how I see things before.

Not until someone strode into my life and changes everything.

Those times when I wonder…

I wonder what kind of spell do they cast to these feeble individuals. Who think love is an oxygen that can make their lives alive and kicking, that without it, they would all die.

I wonder why people are thirsty in love, why they’re all in a rush in finding the right one which leads them to the wrong track. There are a lot of questions, clarifications and confusions I so long to be answered.

But now…

He gave me answers.

For how long was it again we became friends? For how long was it again I didn’t see you coming? For how long was it again I focused all my attention to the other? For how long was it again I realized you and me could be together?

Well…

I actually fell for you before I even realized I did.

Isn’t it amazing, when someone comes into your life unexpectedly and you expect nothing out of it, but suddenly all you need is just right there… in front of you.

However,

Struggles really do exist in love because it is required in order to survive in life and to keep you stronger. There is indeed no great love ever came without great struggle.

It’s kind’a funny how my first, really have a lot of things to fix while going through with it. And this is the kind of relationship that is against all odds.

Many might be against us, but when two hearts beat as one, who do you think they are? Because love is pulling together against all odds.

 

Bitter Sweet Love

Firsts would always be superb and endings would often be heart-rending. Isn’t it ironic? How you first said “Hi” and I said “Hello” ended up to a moment of silence.

No more “goodbyes” but you hanged me up to the possibility that you and I could have a happy ending.

It was like falling off from a building then suddenly …

“Bang!” you hit the button.

Isn’t it amazing how quickly your mood can change?

How those sweet messages turned out to bitterness.

I wonder…

was it always something like this? You’ll feel a moment of gladness followed by sorrow.  My self-destructive heart melts under the sun like a chocolate.

The two of us are like sunshine and rain, moon and sun, day and night. Never really meant to be together.

I just hope you left me with an explanation.

But NO..

You never really did. And so I guess, the most painful goodbyes are the ones that are never really uttered.

First time will always be “first time”. How I wished we could just stay on the first time, we could just keep where we first started, or we could just remain what we were like how we first  met.

When I first saw you,

I met you,

I liked you,

I got you,

But then you got bored,

and left…

Love is indeed like a cup of coffee I drink on a one dusky cold evening,

Where I can taste its sweet sensation at first, yet comprises bitterness as I go through it.

Now tell me…

How could you just make memories with someone and then walk away like nothing really happened?